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[grandtrashking]

(Continued from here)

[Now Tobio's getting under his skin, when the intent was the other way around, because what the hell is this kid going on about? And calling him an idiot on top of it? The audacity.

Fortunately, Tooru knows Hajime would kick his ass if he got into another fight, so he behaves. For the moment. But what the hell Tobio?]

And what lesson was that?

[He'll sort the rest out later.]

Comments

[shadow_mountain]

You taught me no one would help you but yourself.

[He thinks for a minute.]

... And don't meet your heroes.

[grandtrashking]

[Something in him feels pained at that, like cold water is splashed on his face after a loss. He really was a different person back then but he's changed since then before it was knocked into him, literally, even if it's due to feeling threatened by people like Tobio and Ushijima.]

That explains why you became the King then.

Look kid, I don't like geniuses, you don't have to work hard to get where you are, it just comes to you while the rest of us spend months or years to get where we are.

[He's going there, and still bitter about that.]

[shadow_mountain]

The hell...?

I work hard! I practice every single day! If I'm not sleeping or in class I'm working my ass off to be better!

So what if I have natural talent? It means nothing if I don't work hard!

[Now he's kinda angry. Is that really how Oikawa saw him? That he just sat around with his thumb up his ass because he was some kind of genius? If that was the case he wouldn't have lost a single match. He could fail just like everyone else. It just made him want to work even harder to be better!]

... Nothing comes naturally. I bust my ass off learning from my mistakes and getting stronger. Just like everyone else!

[grandtrashking]

[It's a damn good thing that he's not talking with Ushijima, who pisses him off all the same, or he just might throw a punch. Just like in middle school when Hajime stopped him and knocked sense into him. But boy does he have the urge to throw one right now. The kid just doesn't get it, he replaced him in a match, because he was better.

Even if Tooru got a best setter award in a match against Shiratorizawa, but that's neither here nor there.

Instead he just glares. The same kind of smug, cold, glare he gives in a match where he can't lash out, but the anger is boiling beneath his skin.]

The point, my dear Tobio, is that you don't have to work as hard as everyone else. You and the shrimp just have it come to you naturally and leave us all behind eventually.

[shadow_mountain]

[Throwing a punch would be fine. He could understand that. But this? He didn't get it... Oikawa wasn't getting it and Kageyama was definitely the very last person who could ever explain it!

He has to take a breath, look away and resist telling him to fuck off and then storm off because what the hell was the point arguing this?]

Whatever... Keep thinking that.

[A frown.]

... You're wrong though.

[grandtrashking]

[If Tobio wanted to tell him to fuck off, that'd be fine too, since Tooru's close to doing that as well. He doesn't care to have it explained to him, but he'll humour the crow for now. Just to see what Tobio throws at him.

And then he laughs, cold and annoyed, at being told he's wrong. He knows when he's wrong most times, and other times he has it drilled into him, but he's entertained by Tobio of all people. So the king's learned some things then has he.]

Oh do tell me, what am I wrong about? Don't tell me you can't see that you improve quicker than the others, is his majesty blind?

[shadow_mountain]

[He scowled. Always Oikawa would resort to calling him that when he was trying to piss him off. And always it worked. Kageyama was pissed. But he was doing his best to keep himself in check...

That didn't stop his hands from balling at his sides and his words to be forced out between clenched teeth though.]

If I'm blind... You're deaf.

You don't listen. You've made up your mind. That's why you'll... you'll never surpass me!

[grandtrashking]

[Being observant as he is has that effect on people, and coming up with the right words to throw them off was just a side-effect of it all. Just like him, though he'd never admit it, all it took was the right words to hit a sour spot to make someone snap.

His friends even had teased him not to be friends with him for how he points out those kinds of weaknesses.

And he does see those fists balling up, causing a smirk. Even if that surpassing him comment struck another nerve of his, showing it with a brief eye twitch.]

I do listen to people, if you're the right person. Why do you think I can bring the best out in my team? And if I can't surpass you, then why did you ask for my help?

[shadow_mountain]

[Around and around in circles. Hinata listened better than this and understood quicker than this. How was it someone as smart as Oikawa couldn't figure it out? Why did he have to spell it out for him? That wasn't his job to do. Why was it down to him all of a sudden? What was this conversation even? Why was he still standing here arguing over something that was never ever going to change?

Kageyama knew he was beating a dead horse. Had thought that maybe he was over doing the same thing again and again and expecting a different result. His team had drilled that into him. Open your eyes. Adapt. Learn. Work with his team. Bend to their abilities to heighten his own.

But he wasn't doing that here. Because Oikawa's mind was already set. It was already stuck in the past that he couldn't see anything else before him. Kageyama shook his head and glanced away again. It was useless. So if it was useless then his words didn't matter. He could say what he wanted.]

... I a-admired you. You were amazing, I wanted to learn from you...

You never gave me that chance.

Simple.

[It was just that simple.

Sometimes Kageyama wondered just what would have happened if Oikawa had taken him under his wing. Where he would be right now. Just how good could they have gotten... if Oikawa had opened his eyes.]

[grandtrashking]

[Well this is no fun, not getting the desired effect from Tobio. Getting him to snap would have just boosted his ego and need for superiority over him. Hell, he really must have grown up since then, as much as Tooru's loath to admit. Doesn't want to acknowledge, yet also does, that Tobio has certainly improved and is a good player.

But he'll still stand on the top one day, he has his own goals to go after.

But he just can't stop himself from making childish remarks.]

Maybe if you beg again like before, I'll help, since I haven't stopped practicing either. You did knock Ushiwaka down, so maybe I'll change my tune.

[As pissed as he is about that too, it was a damn good match even he could agree to having watched.]

[shadow_mountain]

I REFUSE!

[Taking a step forward, hands clenched so tight his knuckles had turned white, Kageyama's voice raised to a yell.

He was being mocked.

Of all the things to mock, his honest feelings were the wrong thing. Call him King. Call him useless. Trash. A egomaniac. Call him whatever the hell you wanted. Despite his own thoughts that his words didn't matter, once they had been spoken, he realised they had. They had been honest. They'd been the truth.

And Oikawa showed him once more that his honest feelings would never be accepted.]

Get lost! Get out of my face! I'm done with you!

[grandtrashking]

[And that's what he was looking for, not even flinching when stepped closer to. Hajime would have smacked him by now, so Tooru just stands there unfazed except with a bit of a wider smirk. He'd hit the sore spot, and admittedly feels just a bit better watching Tobio snap on him.

Though he did mean it, if Tobio begged he just might help him. The guy has skill as much as he doesn't want to say it, but he does also have a lot to learn at the same time. Tooru could help, if only to one day crush him in a match at both of their bests.]

Now now Tobio-chan~ I wasn't kidding about that. I can help you! After all, if you're not at your best the next time we meet on the court, what fun would it be to crush you?

[Then, finally, a step back with feigned dramatic surrender.]

Enough of that now, tell me something will you? When I clarified romantically, just what did you mean by your answer of "you" to me? I know you admired me and followed me around, but was it just that, admiration?

[shadow_mountain]

[Kageyama froze.

It was hard switching gears so quickly. His anger had flared up, burning hot enough to singe the world around him... But just like that, ice water had been thrown in his face and he stood there, stunned.]

... What?

[Not the smartest thing to have ever come out of his mouth, and a word barely uttered to boot. Why was Oikawa asking this now? Was he mocking him again?]

[grandtrashking]

[Curiosity won out, and it was on the back of Tooru's mind even with riling Tobio up. Half of him confused, the other half too damn nosy and curious for his own good.

Could he really use that to his advantage in a game if it was true? How much of a dick move would that be, how low even for him would that be to do something like that. Sure, he's teased girls, but never got cruel to them. He can be an asshole, but he's not someone who'd stoop that low if it's feelings towards him.

Not to mention the weird "what the fuck" feeling still buzzing in his head.]

You heard me, just what did you mean by that? Humour me Tobio-chan, spell it out for me what exactly you meant by that.

[shadow_mountain]

[No... He didn't want to. If he spelled it out he'd just be mocked again.

What would be the point in reopening that wound? He wasn't a masochist even if Oikawa was clearly a sadist.

But by the same token he knew he'd fucked up. Knew that having said anything at all it would cause his old senpai to harp on it... What if he said something in public? Then everyone else would question it. But if he did spell it out... Maybe Oikawa would be so disgusted he'd never bring it up again? Maybe he'd do him a favour and never show himself in front of him ever again?

Kageyama glanced over at Oikawa, eyes narrowed.]

Can't you work it out? I thought you were smart?

You asked about romantic feelings and I said you. What else could that mean? You asked about crushes... and I said you. [He gave a snort and looked away.] This is what I mean. You can't hear what people say.

[grandtrashking]

[For once he's actually being genuine, and wants a straight answer. Not to mock him, but to just get answers. But he shrugs and sighs with an eyeroll, unsurprised by how Tobio's responding.]

So you're telling me that you have those kinds of feelings... For me?

[There's no way he's serious, right? He could have sworn Tobio was into the short redhead this whole time with how they acted, though he got the same comments about Hajime from Hanamaki and Matsukawa.]

I am smart, I just wanted to hear you say it again to make sure I heard you right!

[Because seriously Tobio, WTF was even that answer. He'd expected something entirely different.]

[shadow_mountain]

Had.

[He corrected the word with a scowl.

Even if, somewhere deep down, those feelings were buried somewhere. Why would he let them out now? Oikawa didn't feel anything for him but disgust and anger. Kageyama needed to make sure Oikawa was under now delusion as to what his feelings meant. And that they were back in the past.]

Like I said. You showed me your true feelings. I learned my lesson well.

What's the point in having feelings for someone who hates you?

[He shrugged and turned on his heel.

What was the point indeed...]

[grandtrashking]

Fine fine, you had those feelings for me. In the past.

[A snort, paying close attention to everything that's being said, arching an eyebrow and thinking back on their Kitagawa Daiichi days where Tooru was certainly at his worst. Absorbed into doing everything on his own until having it pointed out to him that he can't.

So he decides to change his tone to one less antagonistic, and more or less friendly. Polite even.]

You know, the way you just said that doesn't make it sound like you've given up on them.

[His hands shoot up in more of a surrender with a shake of his head and a huff.]

And before you start yelling at me again, I'm not trying to get into your head right now.

[He has his own moments of not being an asshole, surprisingly.]

[shadow_mountain]

[He was actually about to turn back around and yell, but being called out stopped him in his tracks.

Kageyama shot Oikawa a dirty look. Even if he wasn't trying to piss him off, somehow he had a knack of doing it anyway.]

What does it even matter? Why do you care?

[grandtrashking]

[Hands drop to his sides, slipping into pockets with a possibly risky few steps closer, though not in a threatening way and to just make his way by him yet keep any pace if followed. His way with words seemingly keeping him on top of the conversation, and at least no punches are being thrown.

For now, but he'd like to keep it that way.]

Shouldn't you be honest with yourself? You'll never know if you keep lying to yourself.

[Tobio once again, being given advice by Tooru over something simple. It worked out well last time, so why not test that luck again?]

Listen, I hate to admit it, but you're not half bad in looks. You having feelings for me isn't something I'll hold over your head in a match.

[shadow_mountain]

[What...?

Be honest with himself? What was going on here? Kageyama didn't move, only his eyes followed where Oikawa walked, brows knitted in confusion.

This wasn't going the way he expected and he was getting a headache.]

I'll never know what?

[Even as he made the demand a hand had lifted to pinch the bridge of his nose.]

Like I'd let you hold this over me...

[grandtrashking]

[Is he really that dense as to not understand? Tooru's the one getting a headache now, feeling like he's losing braincells. This must be how his friends feel when he does dumb things, but oh well, he can deal with.

He just needs to make Tobio spit it out.]

Please tell me you're just playing stupid and you're not actually this dumb... I'm talking about spitting it out to the person you like, without stalling or making stupid excuses. Just say it.

You'll never know if someone else feels the same if you don't.

[Has he thought Tobio Kageyama was more than just a pain in his side and a shadow looming over his path to success? Maybe, now that he's thinking about it himself, but like hell he'd be the first to admit more than what he's let on. He sure as hell isn't gonna be the one to make some dramatic confession, regardless of how dramatic he can be.]

I'm many things, Tobio-chan, but I'm not terrible enough to fuck with someone's feelings like that.

[shadow_mountain]

[Then why was he being a hypocrite? If he didn't fuck with people's feelings why was he standing there demanding Kageyama spill his own?]

... You... think it's that damn easy?

[The words are forced out between gritted teeth. This was so stupid. Why was he even playing this game? What good would come from this? Why was Oikawa so determined?

Without quite realising he'd done it, Kageyama had taken a step forward. Then another. Unlike Oikawa who had tried to be as non-threatening as possible, Kageyama's expression was dark.]

So just say it, huh?

I'll never know, huh?

Just say the words so you can laugh, is that it?

[Step. Step... and finally he was in front of Oikawa. A hand shot out to grab the front of his shirt in a vice-like grip, his voice a near-growl.]

You wanna know I like you? Does it make you happy knowing that?! That I'm as dumb as you think I am? Yeah, I do. I'm an idiot and I like you and what good does it do me, huh? NOT A DAMN THING! So are you happy now?

[He shook him a bit, voice getting louder as the tightly held control of his emotions frayed and soon broke...]

[grandtrashking]

[He shakes his head, of course he knows how hard that can be, but he's also too prideful to admit anything first. Although continuing to strike a nerve, this time entirely not intended, does give him a bit of a thrill.

He just can't help being amused by his rival being riled up, it's just too easy. But he's playing nice and peaceful, so Tooru keeps himself as non-threatening as he can be. Dare he say it, he's proud of Tobio's reaction.]

Did I ever say it was easy or that I'd laugh? Think. Use that brain of yours, or actually, stop using it too much and listen.

[He's staying annoyingly calm, as calm as he can be at least.

Though getting his shirt grabbed does get a reaction, a half-yelp even from the startle. That wasn't expected. But the yelling again was, and all Tooru can do is smirk. Dare he say it, he's proud of Tobio.]

There, you said it! You gonna leave it at that while up in my face, or leave me hanging?

[shadow_mountain]

[He's listened enough. What else was there to listen to? Just because Oikawa hadn't said he was going to laugh didn't mean he wouldn't and why wasn't he struggling? Why was he just standing there with that damned smirk on his face? Kageyama had an overwhelming urge to punch him... To do something to wipe that smile away.

Leave him hanging...? He'd love to throw him off of a damn bridge or... or the top of a building or out of a plane! Would he keep smiling then? Would he keep spouting nonsense then?

The hand gripping Oikawa's shirt tightened and, clenched and gave another shake.]

You... drive me insane.

I... [Hate you... I hate you I hate you I hate you...

His other hand clenched, balled into a fist and rose...

But instead of shooting out to strike that stupidly smiling face, it joined the other hand to grab Oikawa's shirt and tugged him hard, near off his feet, and straight into a not-very-gentle kiss.]